black couples

it's good to see black couples last thru the trials, tribulations, and temptations of fame & fortune. many continue to hold on to love while others call it quits. i know i'm supposed to blogging about that new immigrant bill or the divinci code suit but it's the weekend and i'm not feeling that bullshit right now.

at any rate, in my ponderings of black love, i've found the happy couples, the least likely to succeed couples, and the has been couples. the following statements result from my warped sense of humor so don't take any of it seriously.

Category 1: The Happy Couples

1) Tisha & Duane Martin


This couple seems to be happy. They are usually all smiles and seem to be enjoying each other's company. They have a child together and Duane doesn't seem to mind that Tisha Campbell is now shaped like a block of cheese. Good luck to these too and may the forces of love be with you. (however, they may encounter problems in paradise... details below.)

2) Denzel & Pauletta


I love to see these two together. Maybe it's because Pauletta is dark and lovely, even though people often say she's unattractive. That's probably because denzel is high-profile and folks may think he should be with someone who looks like halle. Anyway, forget the haters, i love these two. and she's not trippin' about the sanaa lathan rumors.

sanaa lathan


supposedly, sanaa and denzel had an affair and she was alledgedly pregnant with his baby. they both deny the rumors but i, personally, think something happened between the two and if i were pauletta i'd be raising hell. she probably is... probably has his ass sleeping on the couch other side of the house. regardless, i think they'll survive. they've been together this long, why the hell not?

3) mary j. and kendu


this is another couple i love. after all her tumultuous relationships and drama, mary j. has finally found a man who seems to truly care for her and brings out the best in her. i'm sure he has had to deal with her baggage, but he continues to stick by her side. her song be without you was obviously a tribute to kendu who is the love of her life. it's apparent that she still struggles with her past mistakes, hence a song off her latest album called enough cryin which is supposed to be a song talking about her relationship with her ex k-ci of jodeci.

k-ci


i think mary j. and kendu will make it for the long run. their love seems genuine. they make and awfully cute couple.

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Category 2: the couples that are least likely to succeed

1) Jay-Z & Beyonce


everybody's favorite couple. we all love to see them at basketball games together and all hugged up on the red carpet. however, i don't think this relationship will last. first of all, beyonce is a very busy woman and jay-z is, well, a man. as we all know, she's been busy filming dream girls and jay-z has been handling it very well. i read somewhere that he was spotted at a party with women on each arm. and zoe saldana seems to be his shadow these days.

zoe saldana


she's a very pretty girl, albeit bony as hell.

and i know this one is a little young, but she is legal and looks an awful lot like beyonce.

rhianna


and jay-z signed her to his record label and seems to be grooming her to be just like his beloved girlfriend. maybe he's preparing her to take beyonce's place once she starts looking her age.

everyone knows hova loves him some light-skinned girls so bey, girl, watch your back.

2) will & jada


this couple seemingly epitomizes black love. they look like a well-matched couple and have several beautiful children. jada managed to deal with will's relationship with his ex-wife aka baby's mamma, and will has managed to deal with jada's weird-ass rock fetish.

jade performing w/ rock group wicked wisdom




however, they may be well-matched in many ways. they could both be in the closet. for example, jada's butch look & will's iffy masculinity. could there be potential temptations? could jada hook up with hoopz from the flavor love and will hook up with duane martin?

hoopz & duane martin


ok, that's kinda far-fetched, or is it? i seriously think jada likes girls. and i think will likes duane martin a little too much. those two are even starting to look alike. i'm just sayin', eventually they are both going to come out of the closet and it'll be all over.

3) boris kodjoe & nicole ari parker


first of all, let me say that boris kodjoe is like the finest man on the planet. with our without clothes on he is hot as hell. and that smile... i say DAYUM!





and his character in madea's family reunion had me in love with his fine ass. with that horrid wig and all.

boris & lisa arrindell anderson in a still from madea's family reunion


now that i have that out of the way, nicole & boris make a lovely couple aesthetically. they just look good together. they fell in love on the set of the hbo series soul food and ended up having a baby together. however, it doesn't seem like boris is that into nicole. whenever they are together, he looks like he'd rather be somewhere else. and he's working right now, and she's not. he is gorgeous and i'm sure he works with gorgeous women all the time. i don't think he was ready for marriage but he felt it was the right thing to do. whatever the case, i wish them well but i don't think their relationship will last.

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Category 3: the has been couples

1) oprah & stedman


the word around is that oprah and stedman are over and done. supposedly, the life partners (isn't that what gay couples call their relationships?) were conflicting about the issue of children - oprah wants kids but stedman doesn't. he already has a daughter and i guess that's enough for him. [ story]

since they aren't working out, i wonder if he will find comfort and oprah's best friend, gayle king.

gayle king


isn't that how it works? couple breaks up and the best friend becomes the confidant and it turns into an episode of Y&R or some shit like that? maybe not, though. gayle seems like a cool chick (don't they all?).

2) eddie & nicole


eddie, nicole, & the kids


aw hell, we all knew this was going to happen. after the transvestite prostitute incident years ago, we knew things were going down hill. eddie likes men and that just isn't gonna fly in a marriage. all i have to say is i hope nicole gets her damn money and the kids are well-taken care of. this one is sad.


3) kimora & russell


one of black america's greatest power couples has called it quits. i thought these two could make it (maybe i'm just naive) but russell is moving on to younger models. i guess kimora didn't do it for him anymore. at any rate, they will both be just fine because they are holding down clothing lines and other shit. this is another sad one because they have 2 gorgeous little girls together.

kimora w/ daughters



4) bobby & whitney


what can i say about these two? nothing that hasn't already been said. i would like to blame whitney's crackheadedness on bobby, but who know, she could be the one who turned him out. now she's locked up in a bathroom getting high all day.



got bobby christina living with relatives. bobby's out doing who knows what. this was a disaster marriage from day one. maybe we should all be glad this one is over... for now at least.

5) ciara and bow wow


no one is surprised about this break-up. they are both very young and in an industry where there's a lot of temptation. plus, ciara is a good foot taller than bow wow's midget ass.

ciara and bow wow performing


bow wow wasn't man enough for miss ciara, even though he was trying hard as hell to be hard with his grill and threatening lyrics. bow wow is taking the breakup quite well... read somewhere that he's getting low with skippers these days. t-pain's song is now his reality. oh well, guess he's getting it however he can since ciara's goodies are back in the jar.

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with all this said, it just confirms my beliefs that marriage sucks (been there, done that) and being single is and will continue to be the way to go.